You’re going back to work after maternity leave. The anxiety about leaving baby gropes your mind. Even on a busy day you’re missing baby when at work. But that was not the case some months ago.
You’ve been an excellent employee of your company since last 5 years. No work seemed too difficult for you. Making efficient and correct decisions was your habit. Your workplace was nothing less than a joyful arena for you.
Now you wonder:
- Will I be able to put myself in the routine?
- What if the feeling of missing baby at work seems to be insurmountable?
- What can I do if I feel like a depressed working mom?
If questions like these seem to be daunting then do not think that you’re the only mom in the world facing this situation. There were many who tackled the same challenges successfully. So, here are some tips for you to relieve you from this concern.
What to do when you are back at work and missing baby
1.) Be Realist and Not Imaginist
A report from dailymail states that most of the moms require at least four months to adjust their schedule at work after returning back to work after maternity leave.
Be patient with yourself, not everything will be set in one week. Try to deal one day at a time.
The research further states that about 27% of those feel tedious to deal with colleagues talking about babies after their return. It will be the best thing if you assure yourself that you’ll not always remain in this rut but these feelings will shrink with time.
If you feel a strong anxious pull even contemplating to give up your job, give attention to a report by The Pew Research Centre. As information available on time.com mothers are now breadwinners in 40% of American homes. This share will keep on growing in the coming days.
John Locke, a philosopher noted that a person recognizes himself as the same being throughout his life, in different times and places. Working moms think about their roles as split personalities of a mother, worker, wife. That can be overwhelming.
Being realistic can help a lot. Prepare yourself at least a month before for this transition.When you’re at work the feelings can be so strong, but you can abate them if you take some small steps. Try carrying your baby’s photo with you at your workplace. Pin it or frame it at a place where you can give a quick look. This will help you to feel connected with your baby.
2.) Getting the Right Child Care
This is probably one of the most important things that helps to deal with working mom anxiety. It will be a wise step if you start searching for a right child care during your maternity leave. This will give you confidence about your child’s well-being when you’re at work.
Try to build a good relation with the nanny. This will add to your assurance that your child is in the right hands. Calling the nanny and listening to your child can relieve you from the feelings of missing your baby. Visiting your baby during the lunch break can alleviate the working mom guilt.
Admit this fact that each caregiver will treat your baby differently. You might be anxious about the quality of care others will give. It is understandable as you have spent months with your baby and you know her very well.
But it might be surprising for you to know that children tend to adapt more easily with their caregiver. Every caregiver has her own way to care and it might surprise you the various ways in which they’ll evolve to care for your child.
Always keep an alternative child care plan with you. What if your baby gets sick? So have a close confidant who can get into action if such incidents happen. This will relieve you from your uneven anxiety at your workplace.
Mary relates her experience when she had to join her new job when her daughter was just four months old. She says, “I hopefully found a good babysitter who later became one of the extended family members. Now I’m a cheerful mom returning back to work leaving my child into safe hands. I’m no more missing my baby.”
3.) Stop Feeling Guilty
Going back to work after maternity leave can induce mixed emotions. You’ve apprehension for your job, but a wave of anxiety can trigger guilt in your mind. You may start wondering that you’re losing the joy you had during the maternity leave. You might also think that you would not be there when your baby started to toddle, uttered her first gibberish.
It is not easy to overcome such feelings of guilt. Here are some practical recommendations that can be helpful.
- Confide in someone: No matter how tough you are, speaking to someone who can understand you can help you to gain some amount of comfort. You could say I miss my baby. A kind and close friend will boost your morale to get rid of those pangs of guilt.
- Involve your partner: Share responsibilities with your husband. Build a bond of trust with your mate. When you share in responsibilities you’ll feel less anxious. You’ll also feel more confident because you’re not alone to tackle the challenges. This will reduce your guilt.
- Try the Jedi Mind Trick: Make a mom’s box and take it with you at your workplace. Now, whenever you feel guilty or missing your baby, then open the box. Put those thoughts into that box. Close the box and keep it aside, away from your eyes. This will help you to keep those thoughts on the shore.
- Spend some quality time with your baby: On the weekends spend time with your child caring for her need, do some baby work. This will infuse in you a sense of fulfillment. You’ll feel that you’ve done something worthwhile for your baby. This can prove extremely helpful to tackle guilt.
- Get a new haircut and new dress: A new mom going on to work can boost her confidence by getting a new haircut and wearing a beautiful dress. Feeling good about yourself can add bountiful to your happiness.
Over to You
Parenting is a challenge and for a working mom it can be even more challenging. But if you’ll put all your efforts then, at the end of the day you’ll be happy and satisfied, may it be as an employee or as a mother.